I'm finally making the connection between soccer moms and soft rock stations (what my old friend Sara referred to as "flaccid rock"):

Flaccid rock does not entice you to drive like you're in the Indy 500. Music like Rob Zombie and Metallica DOES, therefore putting you and your offspring in danger. Of course, falling asleep at the wheel to Kenny G or feeling suicidal if you have to hear one more note of REO Speedwagon can't be preferable. Any suggestions of a happy medium, anyone? (And anyone who says Avril Lavigne gets slapped. That chick is annoying.)